i have a few thoughts today.

first - butterflies and anvils, the blog is going to shift in content a bit. i still intend on having inspiring images and creative writing, haikus, etc. but i would also like to talk a bit more about what interests me most, the artistic process, our photographic paths, struggles and small celebrations (as my dear friend page calls them!).

last year i took ‘a break’ from heavy artmaking to focus a bit more on my career,  you know, the stuff that makes money and pays the bills. fortunately all of that for me is still in the sphere of photography. however, in hindsight, my advice would be to never, ever take ‘time off’ from our creative work. small breaks from production are healthy, but a full-on hiatus is just too large a break in the stride.

but here i am, scraping and shoving and gnawing my way back. most of the time it feels awful, but two weeks ago, i  had one of those moments in the studio.....a full day of blissful working, production and satisfaction. aaaaaahh.... it’s like the first good run you have of the season. beautiful and much needed.

so now i’m focusing on setting deadlines for myself. mostly in the form of exhibitions and contests. that works for me. helps me focus.

my lesson from this one? i urge you to ride the ups and downs of the creative process and making your work. but i also see value in keeping that process going and moving forward one way or another. clarissa pinkola estes calls creativity, ‘the river that runs below’. if we neglect our creativity for too long, she refers to it as the poisoned river, there’s ways to take it back and get it clean again. but the first thing we must do is merely step in. that’s right - just step in. and keep stepping in. the working process itself helps cleanse the river. gets it good again. flowing again. raging perhaps!

so remember, it’s under there. the creative river that runs below. don’t neglect it. and whether you’re dipping a toe or taking a swandive, just get in. 

detail from latest piece. photo emulsion silkscreens and inkjet on watercolor paper. title: old memories. new dreams.

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talking with you.
about the state of the world.
and where we fit in.
crunching leaves...

moving through. simply.

airplane graveyard.
you stand among the ruins.
delicate and hopeful and young. busted up fuselage. your dress so fitted and pressed.
motionless. burned out wings.
not knowing if the remains are yours.
injured girl.
rusting yellow metal in heaps. lush green grass grows around you. as the bright country sun lights up your hair.
sun flare obscures your face and shoulder.
but you remain.
a giant among the battered pieces.
of this airplane graveyard.
and your world.

once we were best friends. without even knowing.
it's your turn to turn off the light.

once we were alike. without even knowing.
watching thunderstorms on the patio.

once we were confidantes. without even knowing.
we didn’t know what secrets were.

once we were happy. without even knowing.
that goodness meant we were together.

. you whispered. i heard it. i am sure.

grow. i whispered back. on the breeze that blew between us.

grow. i feel it. but i sit here in defiance.

grow. you know it. and you thrust out your shoots, without intention.

grow. i want it. but i am swimming in the thickest sea.

grow. you must. so you reach through the power lines for your sky.

grow. i can. but these tendrils hold me to this merciless earth.

grow. you will. and i’ll look for shelter below you.

grow. i will. but first let me rest my body against you.

grow. you have. and i cannot imagine this world without you.

grow. i am trying. but i cannot keep up with you.

grow. you show me. let me learn from your strength.

grow. i whispered. did i hear it? i am sure.